Title: Saints and Angels
Author: Christina A
Fandom: 24
Pairing: Jack/Kate
Characters: Jack, Kate
Category: Angst, Het, Season Related, Drama, Character Driven
Warning: SPOILERS for Day 3
Rating: PG-13
Disclaimer: I do not own Jack Bauer or the concept of 24. Those honors go to Cochran, Grazer, and Howard, as well as FOX television. Also, the lyrics at the end of the story were performed by Sara Evans.
Summary: At the end of the day, Jack goes home to Kate. But will she let him back in?
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Saints and Angels
by Christina A
He had no right to show up at her doorstep. He was a mess, to put it mildly. Mostly, he was just tired… of everything. Yet here he was, standing on Kate’s porch. His finger hovered over the doorbell. What would happen if he pushed it? Would she open the door and welcome him with open arms? Probably. Kate had a good heart, better than he deserved. So what was he doing here, darkening her door?
It didn’t stop him from ringing the doorbell. It had been one hell of a day. The virus… the innocent dead in that hotel… killing Nina… He didn’t even want to think about Chappelle. He shook his head to try to clear that memory, though he would never be free of that moment. Not ever. He could see it so clearing now. Chappelle on his knees, scared out of his mind because he knew that Jack would pull the trigger. Jack would assassinate him. And that’s just what he’d done. He’d put that gun to Chappelle’s head and pulled the trigger. Chappelle was dead.
What had he become?
The crowning moment was cutting off Chase’s hand… swinging that axe to remove the container bound to his wrist. The container held the last of the virus, so he had no choice. In the end, they’d saved the school and all the children inside, but the price of that day… to him… to his soul… it was immense.
This was his haven, or so he hoped. He prayed. The more he waited, though, the more his hope diminished. What if she didn’t come to the door? Her car was here, so he assumed that she was also. He’d just talked to her yesterday…
Which felt like a lifetime ago.
He shifted his weight from one foot to the other as the seconds ticked away and his anxiety grew.
He ran his hand through his hair again. He truly felt like shit; the ache just gnawed away at him. How wonderful would it be to just lose himself in her? There was a sense of peace that came with Kate that he couldn’t find anywhere else in the world. He’d broken off their relationship when he went undercover to infiltrate the Salazar’s. He knew what he would have to do to make them believe in him. Kate deserved better… so much better than he. Yet even as he talked to her yesterday, her voice was filled with caring and even love.
He knew he shouldn’t be here, but he was.
He waited another couple seconds with thoughts of her floating through his mind, thoughts of how she’d always held him and all his worries would just fade away. Maybe it was selfish to turn up here on her doorstep uninvited. In the grand scheme of things, right now, he wanted to be selfish.
He looked up at the door willing it to open and yet fearful that it would at the same time. When it didn’t, he let out an exhausted sigh. It was a pipedream, really, thinking that he could just come here, knock on her door, and have her accept him back in her life. What would she think when she found out what he’d done? About the people he’d killed, or attempted to kill, in cold blood today? He’d done it because President Palmer trusted him in a way he trusted no one else, but sometimes, like now, he wished that responsibility rested on someone else’s shoulders.
She wasn’t going to answer the door.
It was obvious now, and the sooner he stopped waiting and hoping, the sooner he could find another means to lose himself again. There was something… he just had to find someone to supply it to him.
It was the coward’s way out, and though in many ways, Jack Bauer was no coward. He was also tired… so very tired.
He turned to walk back down the steps, and it was then that everything happened in slow motion. He heard the door open, and then her voice softly said, “Jack.”
When he looked at her, he knew that she was not only surprised by how bad he looked, but happy to see him. For the life of him, he couldn’t imagine how anyone could be pleased to see him.
“The virus is contained, isn’t it? I’ve been watching on the news all day… so worried about you.”
He watched in awe as she stepped out onto the porch and enveloped him in a warm, inviting embrace. “It is.” He paused to return the hug, needing it more than he needed the air he was breathing. “Kate… I…”
“Sshhhh,” she said, running a hand over his hair. “Come inside. You can get a warm shower, change your clothes, and I’ll fix you something to eat. It’s going to be okay, Jack. I promise. It’s going to be okay.”
He followed her inside. Thirty seconds ago, he’d given up hope on anything ever being all right again. But within the circle of her arms, he didn’t feel like a murderer… a recovering addict… a man who would go to any length to do his job. He simply felt like a man. It was the magic of her, and he was going to let himself get lost in it… let himself believe that he was worthy.
We’re only human, baby
We walk on broken ground
We lose our way
We come unwound.
We’ll turn in circles, baby
We’re never satisfied.
We’ll fall from grace
Forget we can fly.
But through all the tears that we cry
We’ll survive.
Cause when we’re torn apart
Shattered and scarred.
Love has the grace to save us.
We’re just two tarnished hearts
When in each other’s arms
We become saints and angels.
I love your imperfections
I love your everything
Your broken heart, your broken wings
I love you when you hold me
And when you turn away
I love you still and I’m not afraid
Cause I know you feel the same way
And you’ll stay
Cause when we’re torn apart
Shattered and scarred.
Love has the grace to save us.
We’re just two tarnished hearts
When in each other’s arms
We become saints and angels.
These feet of clay
They will not stray.
Cause when we’re torn apart
Shattered and scarred.
Love has the grace to save us.
We’re just two tarnished hearts
When in each other’s arms
We become saints and angels.
Saints and angels.
Tags: angst, character driven, drama, het, jack bauer, rating: pg-13